Sofa Club

sofa |ˈsəʊfə|
a long upholstered seat with a back and arms, for two or more people. Or Morgan.

see also Sofa Club.

The first rule of Sofa Club is, “Nobody talks about Sofa Club.”

The second rule of Sofa Club is, “Nobody talks about Sofa Club.”

The third rule of Sofa Club is, “Don’t get onto the sofa until the humans have gone to bed.”

The forth rule of Sofa Club is, “Get off the sofa before they get to the bottom of the stairs.”

The fifth rule of Sofa Club is, “Look cute and innocent if your human suspects you’ve been sleeping on the sofa instead of your nice, comfortable dog bed.”

Hello. My name is Morgan and I have a guilty secret. I enjoy sleeping on my human’s sofa. Every night. For over two weeks. I wait until they’ve gone to bed so it’s not as if they’re using it. It’s. Just. So. Comfortable. They haven’t specifically asked me not to sleep on it. Well, not in writing. So it doesn’t count.

I’m not even sure they realise I’ve been doing it. I came close to being caught in flagrante yesterday morning so today I took the additional precautionary step of getting off the sofa and into my bed as soon as I heard my human stirring. Haha. The look on his face when he saw me. The praise he lauded upon me. The first belly-rub of the day. The odd chuckling noise he made as he walked past the sofa. Humans are easily fooled1.

I’d happily let them swap so I could be on the sofa all of the time. All they have to do is ask. Nicely. My name is Morgan. I am a good boy.

  1. It amazes me they haven’t noticed the still warm dog-shaped indentations I leave behind2
  2. Or the occasional puddle of dribble. 

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